Every individual, created for a purpose | 每個人的生命都有其獨特的使命

Hi everyone! My name is Jasmine Vinson, and I was fortunate enough to go on my first mission trip abroad to Honduras with Living Hope Global Ministries from March 10-17, 2024.

For many years, I knew deep down that I had a burning desire to go on Missions, whether it was within the country or outside of it. During my trip to Honduras, I was given an opportunity to share my testimony at the local prison, in front of over 300 inmates. This was a rare yet daunting opportunity for me, yet I knew that God was speaking to me to share my story while I was there.

I was born and brought up in Singapore until I moved to Canada at the age of 16. I was not born into a Christian family, in fact I was actually an orphan until I was adopted at seven years old. Prior to being adopted, I vaguely remember living with different foster families and also spent one year at the Methodist Children’s home in Singapore. I have faint memories of living in difficult and painful conditions and being taken care of by a foster parent who was an alcoholic. I did not have friends, or even remember going to school at a young age. While I was living in the Children’s Home, I was introduced to Christian songs and bible stories and I attended the daycare within the home. I also remember my adoptive parents visiting me every Tuesday and taking me out for a few hours to spend time with me before dropping me off at the Home again.

After being adopted at age 7, my biggest struggle was learning to accept the love I received from my parents and extended family. I took a long time to address my parents as mum and dad because I did not understand the concept of love, given that I was not raised in a loving home prior to adoption. As I got older, I tried different ways to test my parents’ love for me by doing things they disliked. I was rebellious even in my teenage years because I simply could not comprehend that they loved me no matter what. I always questioned their love for me, and wondered if I deserved the love they had for me.

Another challenge that I faced growing up was moving to Canada at the age of 16. I had to leave my friends and family back home and start all over again in a foreign country. I remember struggling to fit in and as I entered into my young adult years, that was when I started to drift a little away from God. I faced many failures and made mistakes in my University journey, and I doubted that God had a plan for me in my life. Every mistake and failure I faced, I was drifting further from God. I doubted his love for me, and the memories of my childhood started flooding my mind. I chased relationships, friendships and things of this world. However, they could never satisfy me and bring me joy I was longing for. If God is real, then why do I not feel his love for me? That was my struggle, until I recognized that all along, God was there for me even when I did not feel his presence and love.

Deep down, I slowly started to feel peace when I tried to surrender my desires, struggles and pain to God. Though my childhood created a scar in my heart, I knew that God was always protecting and providing for my every need. Every failure, struggle, moment of pain and frustration, was in fact helping me to rely more on God. Today, I want to encourage anyone who feels broken, unworthy of love or lost - No matter what we face in life, or the conditions we have lived in, it is never too late to trust that God has a plan for us more beautiful than we could ever imagine. He is the potter, and we are his clay. If we can surrender our lives to Him and let Him transform and renew us, we will feel true joy and love that we long for. HE created each one of us with a purpose, and he calls us to run back to him.

I truly thank God for giving me the opportunity to go to Honduras and for opening my eyes up to see the needs of this world. The memories I have made and the people I have encountered will always be in my heart. I know that my personal story has shaped me to be the person I am today and it is my desire for God to use me to bring His love to the people that are hurting within, and to let them know that God loves and cares for them.

大家好！ 我叫 Jasmine Vinson，我很幸运能够于 2024 年 3 月 10 日至 17 日与 Living Hope Global Ministries 一起前往洪都拉斯,开始了我的第一次跨国短宣。

多年来，在我内心深处，我一直有一种强烈的愿望去宣教，无论是在国内还是去海外。 在洪都拉斯短宣期间，我有机会去当地监狱，在300 多名囚犯的面前分享我的见证。 这对我来说是一个难得的，但令我敬畏的机会，我知道当我在那里时，神亲自对我说话，让我分享我的见证。

我在新加坡出生和长大，直到 16 岁搬到加拿大。我并不是出生在基督教家庭，实际上我是一个孤儿，直到七岁时被收养。 在被收养之前，我依稀记得我是住在不同的寄养家庭，还在新加坡的卫理公会儿童之家呆过一年。 我记得小时候的生活条件很困难和痛苦，有一个寄养家庭的父母还是酗酒的。 我没有朋友，甚至不记得小时候上过学。 当我住在儿童之家时，我听到了基督教赞美诗和圣经故事，并进入了儿童之家的幼儿园。 我记得我的养父母每周二都会来儿童之家看望我，并带我出去玩几个小时，然后再把我送回儿童之家。

我 7 岁被收养后，我最大的困难就是要学会接受养父母和他们那个家庭给予我的爱。 我花了很长时间才称呼我的养父母为妈妈和爸爸，因为我不明白爱这个概念。我在被收养之前并不是在一个爱的环境中长大的。 随着年龄的增长，我尝试了不同的方式来试图了解这个爱，甚至通过做些养父母不喜欢的事情来考验他们对我的爱。 我十几岁的时候很叛逆，因为我根本无法理解他们会无条件地爱我。 我总是质疑他们对我的爱，我怀疑我怎么会值得他们如此地爱我。

在我成长过程中面临的另一个挑战是 16 岁时搬到加拿大。我不得不离开我的朋友和家人，在异国他乡重新开始。 我记得我拼命努力想融入我的环境中。刚刚成人那段时间，我开始有点远离神。 在我的大学生涯中，我遇到了很多失败，犯了很多错误，我怀疑上帝对我的人生的计划。 我所面对的每一次错误和失败，都让我离神越来越远。 我怀疑他对我的爱，童年的悲惨记忆开始涌入我的脑海，占据我的思想。 我追逐亲密关系、友谊和世俗物质享受。 然而，这些都无法满足我，无法带给我所渴望的快乐。 我在想如果神是真实的，那为什么我感受不到祂对我的爱呢？ 那是我的挣扎，直到我认识到，即使我感觉不到神的存在和爱，祂依然一直都在我的身边。

当我试图将自己的欲望、挣扎和痛苦交给神时，我内心深处开始慢慢感到平安。 虽然我的童年在我心里留下了伤疤，但我知道神一直在保护并供应我的每一个需要。 每一次的失败、挣扎、痛苦和沮丧，实际上都在让我更加信靠神。 今天，我想鼓励那些感到破碎、不值得被爱或失落的人——无论我们在生活中面临什么，或者我们生活在什么环境下，相信神永远不会离弃我们。祂为我们制定的计划，比我们自己想的更美好。 设想一下， 祂是陶匠，我们是泥土。 如果我们能将自己的生命交托给祂，让祂来改变和更新我们，我们就会感受到我们所渴望的真正的喜乐和爱。 是祂创造了我们每一个人，祂对我们每一个人都有一个目的，祂呼召我们回转归向祂。
 
我衷心感谢神给了我去洪都拉斯短宣的机会，让我开阔了眼界，看到了这个世界的需要。 我在那里遇到的人和事将永远记在我的心里。 我知道我的过往经历塑造了今天的我。我渴望神使用我将祂的爱带给那些内心受伤的人，让他们知道神爱他们、关心他们 。